I had an interesting conversation with a client the other day.
A common theme for her, and in fact many of the people I see is the tendency to not just think about, but become consumed with the thought 'What if?'
In relation to most situations that arise in life, many of us spend an inordinate amount of time thinking of all the possibilities that could occur, and often in the negative. And whilst having time and allowing ourselves time to plan and prepare for eventualities is crucial, when it becomes our sole focus of thinking and we begin to think about it unduly, in spite of having done all practicable analysis and planning, it becomes paralysing.
My advice to this client was to focus on "What's now?" vs. "What if?"
This thread is very similar to asking oneself "what am I doing now" – a strategy I discuss in Time Rich Cash Optional.
Stopping ourselves in the midst of worrying and paining ourselves over what could be, and instead focusing on what is, and what is occurring this very moment, and indeed what we can affect in this moment brings us back to the present. The beautiful, wonderful present...the only time that we can live.
When we constantly put ourselves in a mental state of 'if' and 'when' we never give ourselves a chance to live truly and presently. Quite simply we worry the shit out of ourselves instead of living the shit out of life!